On behalf of Sheep Everywhere

by ,
A few years ago there was a TV show on network television: Sabrina the Teenage Witch. It eventually moved to the WB and lost all of its good writers in the process. The term good is relative here. The story line is a bit contrived and the acting half-baked. However, before its station move it always made me laugh and almost never roll my eyes.

I caught an episode the other night on some Nickelodean spin off station targeted towards teens. Let me tell you – did I feel old! All of those commercials, hip newlingo, etc, etc. I have to admit, I was entertained and I told Rob I may have found my new favorite station. Can anyone sense an early life crisis coming on?

For those of you unfamiliar with Sabrina, she is a teenage witch living with her two aunts who are also witches. Apparently there is an Archie comic on which the show is based. I loved Bewitched as a child so perhaps I like Sabrina so much because of nostalgia. On another note of nostalgia, Soleil Moon Frye is now on the show – I love me a little Punky.

There was the funniest episode on the other day, Deliver Us From E-mail. Sabrina’s Aunt Hilda becomes obsessed with knitting. At some point she manages to knit herself into a cocoon. The other Aunt, Zelda, finally confronts her…

The script (yes, at some point google may explode from the amount of information it conjures up):

Int. Spellman living room. It looks like a bombs gone off in it. A wool bomb. Everywhere is littered with woolen products, Hats scarves, sweaters, socks, leg warmers, you name it, it’s there and judging by the skit-a-skit of needles, so is Hilda. Zelda enters.

Zelda– Oh good lord! (Calling up stairs) Hilda! Hilda, we need to talk!

Hilda– (Muffled) I’m right here.

She looks down at the large pile of maroon wool on the arm chair and spots a pair of eyes looking out and lower down a pair of hands industriously knitting away.

Zelda– This has gone far enough. I demand that you stop, on behalf of sheep everywhere.

Hilda– What are you getting so worked up about?

Zelda– Your new hobby has become a pathology. You’re addicted to knitting.

Hilda– Zellie, I knit because it relaxes me. I can stop anytime I want to.

Zelda– Look at you! You are knitting alone! You are hiding balls of yarn under yarn cosies! You’ve knitted yourself into a woolen pod! You are a knitaholic! A knitfomaniac! A knit-wit!

Hilda– A knit-wit? That’s cute. I’m going to knit that on a pillow.

A knitfomaniac! Ha! I love it. I’m going to knit THAT on a pillow. Does this episode repeat itself in our homes every day or what?!

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